Many Mistakes and Would Be Soulmates
by The Princess of Pain
Summary: Loki looked to where his soul-mark used to be, and regrets. Coulson/Loki Natasha/Clint Jane/Thor Implied Steve/Bucky T for Character Death. Loki-centric.


Soulmate AU: Loki looked where his soul-mark used to be, and regrets. Coulson/Loki Natasha/Clint Jane/Thor

I do not own the Avengers, or Thor. Nor Loki.

"Move away, please."

Loki stops as his arm begins to ache. Thor freezes. Those words. Loki knows those words well. They've been written on the right side of his arm since he came into his own. His soulmate is still talking, and he's only half listening, trying to comprehend that his soulmate is in front of him. Why now? He's so busy trying to figure it out, he forgets to banish the clone until it has the scepter imbedded in his soulmate's chest. Loki heart stops and he quickly banishes the illusion, letting his soulmate fall to the ground, weapon still clenched tight in his hand.

His arm burns and Thor is screaming out and Loki **moves**. He's by his soulmate's side before Thor blinks, dropping the weapon and hovering his hands over the wound. His soulmate is still talking, something about how he won't win, and suddenly Loki is smashing through a wall, coughing and trying to breathe because whatever his soulmate hit him with hurts like hell while his arm is on fire. He can't get up and he hears his soulmate say something then fall silent. He struggles to get up, to try to heal him, but his vision is fading and Thor is still screaming and all Loki can think is _please…_

Loki wakes up back in his cell with Thor by his side and a numbing sensation in his right arm. He ignores his brother trying to push him down, and yanks his right sleeve up. The ink that had been black for centuries were gone. So, he was his soulmate. Loki stared at the blank expanse for a moment, then pitches forward to throw up. His brother holds back his hair and cleans off his mouth with a cloth when he's done, uncharacteristically gentle. As he's trying to breathe, Thor starts to talk. "Son of Coal used a weapon specially designed to be used against Asgardians. It was a precaution created after my banishment. He perished shortly after shooting you with the gamma ray. I am so sorry, Brother." Loki takes a moment to process this. His soulmate is dead. The one person who would have excepted the fact he was Jotun, not Æsir gone. His one chance at true happiness **gone…**

Loki tried to push away from Thor, but he held his arm tight. "The tesseract has been secured and your mind control over Dr. Selvig and Barton is no longer. We are going home. You are to be tried for your actions against Midgard. You've lost Loki." Thor told him. Loki didn't say anything, and after several minutes of silence, Thor released him and left him to his thoughts.

The day Loki left earth he was forced to put up with the Avengers, Thor's new friends.

"Вы уничтожили собственное счастье сдуру Бога…" That was the spy, the one who pleaded for her Lover's (Soulmate's?) life. Loki wished he didn't have the muzzle around his face so he could spit at her.

"Bastard. Phil is lucky he didn't have to put up with you." Barton growled at him, arms wrapped around Romanoff's waist. Loki dully noted that Phil must be his soulmate's name.

Banner didn't say anything, but his eyes glowed bright green.

Stark wasn't there. Loki really didn't care.

Rogers however, smiled sadly at him and pressed something in his hands. Loki looked down and saw a Captain America card. They must have belonged to his other-half. Loki pretended to throw them away in disgust and slipped them up his sleeve (up so they were touching were his Soulmark used to be) when no one was looking. Thor held out the tesseract and he grabbed the side of it loosely. Thor turned it and one moment they were surrounded by colors and sound and everything, then it stopped and they landed, Thor on his feet, Loki on his back. His brother held out his arm to help him out but Loki ignored him. He was back in Asgard. Alone and once again an outcast. He closed his eyes and didn't open them again. _Because what was the point of anything?_

When Loki woke up, he was in a lavish cell. He didn't care. Taking out the cards, he ran his fingers over them. These were his soulmate's most prized possession. He must have idolized Captain America. He thought about summoning an illusion of his Soulmate, but quickly banished the thought as quickly as it came. Why make his heart hurt more than it already did?

Time went on. Nothing changed. He rarely left his bed. Thor visited him sometimes and told him about the happenings of the Kingdom, the Warriors and the Avengers. Thor talked to much. He never let him see the blood stained cards that had become his everything. His Mother also came to see him and she stayed with him as he cried in her arms but never told her why he cried. He wondered if they all laughed at him behind his back. The stupid fake Æsir/Jotun runt that went to rule Midgard only to kill his own other half. Thor told him Frigga died. Some part of him cried out and he destroyed his cell in a fit of anger. _Why was everything he loved taken from him every time?_

Thor was worried for Loki. His Brother was wasting away before his eyes. He barely ate anymore. His skin was the color of parchment and he often spent time in bed, staring at the ceiling with dull green eyes instead of sleeping. His cell was a mess and he spoke even less when he found out that their Mother had passed. It was like his brother had lost all will to live. Thor didn't know what to do. He went to visit his Jane, the only one who eased his mind when he felt like this.

Loki awoke to being shooken roughly by Thor. His face was grave as he explained that his soulmate had soummoned the Aether. Loki tuned himout for most of it, until he mentioned that she was in Starfelem. He knew a way in there, undetected. His hand went to his bare arm. To live without your soulmate…Loki turned to Thor and cut him off,

"I know a way undetected."

Thor stared at his brother. His expression was blank and his eyes were glassy, like he wasn't even there. He spoke without any inflection in his voice. Thor wished he could find it in himself to care, but at the moment his mind was occupied about saving Jane.

Thor is getting himself killed and before Loki can think he's plunging a blade into the Monster's back and attaching a bomb to his back. The Monster moves toward him, and he has time to move but why should he? What does he have to live for? He barely even feels the sword as the monster pulls him onto it. He vaguely realized Thor was screaming. And then there is nothing except a plea from a dying man.

 ** _Please All-Father, let me be with him. My Soulmate, let me be worthy now. Let me have a chance to show you how I would have loved you…_**

Thor bury's his brother next to his Mother with his Father staring at him disapprovingly.

"Jotun bastard…"

"…Killed his own soulmate…"

"…Mistake…"

He keeps his head high and his face blank, though he nearly crushes Jane's hand from gripping it too tight. Later, when he asks Jane why she didn't yell at him for mourning his 'atrocious half-breed' brother, his uncaring façade is broken and he starts sobbing in her arms as soon as she tells him that,

"He seemed tired, Thor. I've seen people like him before. Without their Soulmate's they…wither away."

Because that is what happened to Loki. He was once ambitious and clever and through some miracle falling from grace hadn't killed him. But murdering his own Soulmate had. And the second that scepter went through Son of Coal's chest, Loki's soul died.

He went back to earth with Jane. Eventually he found his way back to the Avengers. He fought with them, and over time his heart grew lighter, though it would always ache at the thought of his brother. He was healing. That is, until Phil Coulson walked through the door of Stark Tower one Summer day.

Thor stared at The Son Of Coal, them reached out to punch him. His head jerked back and blood rushed out of his nose. Thor would have done more, but Natasha and Clint jumped forward and grabbed his arms. Thor struggled to get away from them, ignoring Steve telling him to calm down in favor of screaming,

"HE NEEDED YOU! HE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD AND LOST HIMSELF! HE THOUGHT HE KILLED YOU AND DIDN'T DESERVE TO BE SAVED. NOW HE'S DEAD AND YOU'RE HERE! WHY DID YOU DESERVE TO LIVE WHEN HE DIDN'T? LOKI DIDN'T DESERVE THIS!"

They managed to wrestle him out of the room still spitting and cursing, swearing that he would murder Phil. Stark turned to him, one brow raised. "What was that about?"

Phil touched his arm were his words used to be before they disappeared.

"Nothing."

 **A/N: Yep. I killed Loki. I feel horrible. Anyway, this is something that's been in my head for awhile. I haven't seen the pairing before and thought it fit well with the whole 'First words your Soulmate says to you is tattooed on your body' thing. In regards to why Loki's Soulmark disapeared, Coulson did technically die. He just happened to come back. And the reason Steve is so…not dick-ish? He lost Bucky. He knows what it is like to lose your soulmate. Clint and Natsha were soulmates. Obviously, so are Jane and Thor. The reason there weren't many line's on Dark World and Loki's death is because Loki doesn't care. Sure he's moving around and doing things, but he feeling completely empty inside and isn't all there. He's completely apathetic. The only reason he's helping Thor is because he doesn't want Thor to feel the way he does. Side note; I got the russian from google, so it's probably not right. Leave a review and tell me what you thought.**

 **Вы уничтожили собственное счастье сдуру Бога = "You destoyed your own happiness Foolish God."**

 **I remain your obedient servant,**

 **P.O.P**


End file.
